So where were we?

So how ya been Dear Internet? Are you still here??

Sorry I've been MIA for a few weeks/months. I'd like to tell you that I've been spending my summer in the Hamptons and partyin' with Diddy, but that's just not the case. Somewhere in May/June I got this brainiac idea that if I took 16 credit hours for summer session and worked a full time job it would be really good for me. I'm not sure what I was thinking because it was very stressful on me [and my family], but it's over and here we are-with summer vacation officially coming to an end tomorrow and the return of school starting. I'd like to tell you I'm excited that August 25th has finally arrived, but if I'm being honest with you, tomorrow brings waves of sad emotions. Tomorrow starts Adam's final year in high school and with that comes the realization that in less than one year he'll be moving on to college and starting his big boy life. He did commit to a major (for now that is) and I'm pretty excited for him. He's chosen Pharmacy-mainly because I keep preaching "There will always be sick people and there won't always be a need for sports analysts in the world!" We shall see...Whatever he decides he knows I've got his back.

Football starts Friday and I'm so excited!! I love me some high school football!! I love the cool crisp air and wrapping up in a blanket and drinking hot cocoa watchin' my girl Abbie ....oh wait Dear Internet...hold the mother freakin' phones I forgot to tell y'all....Abbie made varsity cheerleader!! Did I tell you that? I think I forgot to tell you. She did! So excited for her! So now she'll be cheering for Adam on Friday nights! There will be cowbell you can count on it!!! heh heh.

Jamie's good. He's been doin' his thing and spending as much time on the motorcycle as possible. I didn't get on the back too much this summer with school and honestly, it's been kind of cold around these parts. I like it hot and well, apparently Ohio didn't get the memo that summer = heat because we've had temps. around the 70's for weeks now. Sucks.

Guess that's about it for me. I did join Facebook again if anyone wants to be my friend just look me up by my email if you have it otherwise leave me your email in the comments and I'll try to friend you. I just ask that you not mention my blog as a vast majority of my family is on my FB and I'd like to keep the two seperate-I'm sure you understand.

Okay that's about it for me...off to make my rounds. I have a feeling I have a lot of catching up to do.

I Sometimes Wonder...

...What little kids think about when their parents are scolding them.
...When I see an older couple holding hands if that will be me someday.
...What my children will remember about their lives growing up.
...If someone just out of the blue thinks "That reminds me of Kim!"
...If it ever gets any easier.
...Why people who seem to have a strong faith core seem happier than others.
...How I got here and is this it?
...If I'll ever be able to put myself first.
...Who comes up with some of the gadgets hanging on the wall at Bed Bath & Beyond?
...Are you still out there Slickster?

I Would Never Leave You Dear Internet

Update

Hi dear internets.
I figured since I've had nothing to tell you I shouldn't waste your time and ramble, but today I have news....

Dan went to surgery this morning and he did well. They found that he had ruptured a disc and it fused to his spine-that was causing all the pain and inflammation. He is resting comfortably at the hospital and will be coming home in two days. The next six weeks are going to be quiet....

Abbie's dental dilemma is underway to being resolved. She's excited and I'm excited for her. I can't wait to see her new smile.

My aunt is still in the rehab. facility, but up and moving around. The docs think she'll be home within the month.

Everything else is what it is. That's my new favorite expression/saying. "It is what it is..."

That's really about it. Tonight I'll finally get some rest since I won't be up every hour and a half taking care of Dan. I think I'm going to need my rest these next two days, because once he comes home it'll be back to sleepless nights.

I hope you've been well dear internet. I've still been reading but not always commenting-Like my mom always says "Sometimes its better to be seen and not heard." G'nite out there and thank you for the positive thoughts and prayers.

Quieting The Voices

I don't know when I became the type of person who worried so much. Maybe it was when I delivered Adam and it just got worse after I had Abs, I'm not sure. All I know is that there are a lot of things happening in and around my life that are causing me a lot of worry and stress and I think it's why my sleep is nonexistent.

Dan is still limping around-he seems to go two steps forward in getting back to his old flumpy self playing and shaking his tail, then there will be moments like tonight all I will hear is a yelp and he'll be standing there like Eeyore with his head down. I called the vet and they up'ed his medicine (again) and told me it could take up to six weeks for his back to heal. How do you keep a dog down for six weeks? Maggie is beside herself. She will just walk around him and whine wanting him to play. So for now, I sleep on the couch with Dan and watch and listen for his every move.

Adam and Abbie's birthday's are coming up within the month and although Adam isn't asking for anything Abbie is (secretly) wanting a big sweet sixteen birthday party. The only thing is if you remember last year Abbie got hurt. Since having root canals her teeth have started to discolor. (I will catch her covering her mouth lately so no one sees her teeth...it breaks my heart when I see her do that) and to top it off, I feel bad because when Adam turned sixteen we bought him a car. It's either a car, her teeth or a party...Unfortunately for Abs, I have to do what's best for her and new chicklets are in order.

My aunt is doing much better, but my mom worries so much that she (my aunt) is just going to up and die like my other aunt did last week so she calls me and wants to know what I think about everything the doctor is doing. She'll call me when the doctor is in the room with my aunt and make me talk to him and then reassure her he's doing the right thing (as if I know?!?) and I find myself mothering my mom.

My niece is going through things I can't even begin to understand. So much has happened in that girls life all because her mom (my twin) seems to have lost her mind. I don't even know where to begin to help her but someone needs to. I took her to dinner tonight just to talk to her and she's so sad. Sad like empty. I don't know how to fix her without killing my sister in the process.

Thankfully life at home with my own family (Jamie and the kids) is great. Jamie's job interview went really well yesterday-"knocked the bottom out of it" is what the text message said...hopefully we'll hear something soon.

I know that I am blessed...I have healthy children in a home that is filled with love, but it's everything else up there that is swirling around in my head that seems to keep me awake at night. Last night I got three hours of sleep and the night before about the same. I need to quiet the voices (as Booster says) and so that's my plan. Blogging will take a backseat...because everything else is more important. So if you don't see me it's because I am taking care of business and helping those I care about most heal. By no means am I trying to play the part of martyr or whatever, I'm just looking for a way to get a few hours of sleep and quiet those voices in my head.